Divorce in the LDS Community

Alright this one is centered a little bit differently than it usual is, but I found that I am unable to get this topic off my mind. I love being a part of the LDS church, I am grateful to and for the church, But there is something I think we as members could be better about, and that is the way we talk to and act around those who have gone through divorce. As a member of a family that experienced divorce in the family not too long ago, I am almost most members who have not experienced have literally no idea how they come across when they talk to or around someone who is divorced or has divorced parents. I am not a fan of divorce, but sadly it happens and I think it is important that we tone down the judgement, especially since we are supposed to be careful not to judge anyway. I think it important to remember that we don't know each other circumstances. It seems to me that a lot of people think they are being helpful, but quite often come across as rude, patronizing, and honestly like they pity. I get that people probably don't mean to come across that way, and maybe I am reading it wrong, but I think we need to be more sensitive. My mom is a strong woman, and people acting like she can't take care of herself or is less spiritual because she went through a divorce is just something I don't think is okay at all. I think if people really want to try and be helpful they should try to actually understand what happens when someone experiences divorce. I think it's also important to remember that everyone has experienced different circumstances and you will never know. I know eternal marriage is important and a big deal in the church, but that doesn't make it okay for people to act those who get divorced are less than those who are married. You wouldn't do that to someone who had never been married before, would you? I don't know, this probably sounds a lot more angry that it meant too. For the record, I'm not mad about it, just passionate because it affects people I love and care about. Just something to think about.

Natural Consequences

So obviously, I am not a parent and I most likely will not be one anytime soon. That being said, I can still start preparing to be a mother now. I think one of the most interesting things I have learned recently though, is when a child gets into a situation and they own the problem, they deal with the natural consequences of the event. I find that really interesting because I am not even a mother yet and I feel like I would want to step in and make sure my child was okay. But the best thing for the child, as long as it isn't dangerous, affects someone else, or the consequence is too far in the future, would be to let them handle it themselves. It sounds kind of weird at first, but it makes sense if you think about it. What could I possible teach them that they wouldn't learn if they had to deal with the natural consequence? Now a natural consequence is anything that happens because directly because of the situation, without any interference from the parents. A parent should still be there as a support system, but not the problem solver. It shows the child that the parent trust and respects them enough to be able to handle it themselves. Children probably won't think that right away, it will probably frustrate them, but eventually they will probably realize. It sounds really hard, I can't even imagine doing it. But letting your children learn from their mistakes is probably one of the best ways to show that you love them in my opinion.